olindom: (Default)
olindom ([personal profile] olindom) wrote2018-08-24 04:23 pm

Black Humor. 1.

 A man complains sadly to a psychologist: “Nobody seems to like me.“ 
-
The psychologist responds: “What do you think could be the reason for that?“
-
The man looks at him: “So is it my task or yours to find that out you moron!“
“There’s no way you’re going out in this skirt, kiddo!”
-
“But mom, I’ve got great legs, why should I hide them?!”
-
“Because it’s so short and your nuts are showing underneath!”
God created childbirth to give women the chance to experience what it's like for a guy to catch a cold.

What happens to the children that are not picked up from Smallland in Ikea? And what did you think Köttbullar were made of?
An awkward housewarming visit:

“Oh but this is wonderful – your couch has a massage function – and it’s so nice and warm!”
-
“You’re sitting on our cat.”
I yelled: “It’s a boy!!!! I cannot believe it – it’s a boy!!!” I was so overwhelmed, I literally stood there in tears.

– Mike, 32, abruptly ending his holiday in Thailand
I tried to phone my cousin in France in 1943 but the line was occupied.
*************
“And how do you find this year’s spring?”
“Breathtaking.”
 
– Silvie, 25, suffers from severe pollen allergies
My poor skills as an electrician often leave people shocked.

Click here for more jokes: https://short-funny.com/new-dark-humor.php#ixzz5P6NQyLaJ

Click here for more jokes: https://short-funny.com/new-dark-humor.php#ixzz5P6MuYWKq
math_mommy: (Default)

[personal profile] math_mommy 2018-08-24 06:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Бедный Майк :-)
chuka_lis: (Default)

[personal profile] chuka_lis 2018-08-24 08:37 pm (UTC)(link)
точно,черный)